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February 14, 2006
Ritual and tradition
Valentine's Day is a potent day of ritual.
The average American will spend $100 today on gifts. That's up about $3 from last year and will total about $13.7 billion.
More than one billion cards will be exchanged, 85% of them by women. It's the biggest day of the year for the floral industry; some 180 million roses will be sent.
Americans spend a handsome chunk of change to reaffirm or declare their affection for a loved one because.... that's what we've always done.
As kids in school, our parents bought us boxes of Valentine's Day cards to hand out to favorite classmates. Later, we graduated to chocolates for boyfriends/girlfriends. Then hordes of self-conscious guys explore the mystery of flower shops. Spend-happy adults buy jewelry. It's a cultural thing, with marketers fueling but not creating, the tradition.
It's a cultural ritual we perform, as we have since the 14th century when lovers first exchanged hand-written notes on this day. The power of ritual in the context of employees, customers or members is often bypassed in the name of efficiency, overhead or fear of offending one person who doesn't believe.
But Joseph Campbell taught us that humans crave ritual. It's reassurance in our quest to understand our origins. The organizations that embrace ritual thoughtfully and purposefully -- even simple stuff like employee of the month awards, company-wide exercise drills or over-the-top Halloween celebrations -- are sure to create stronger emotional ties with their tribe of fellow believers.
If you're reading this and still haven't made your Valentine's Day gift selection, here's some sage advice from the "Dwight Schrute" blog:
Don't buy anything 'heart-shaped', 'floral' or made of chocolate this valentines day. Don't purchase anything with a cupid or fluffy theme to it. Don't buy anything that contains something else that is cute and/or romantic. To show your 'mate' that you adore them, do something worthwhile for them. Clean up their yard. Shovel something for them. Give their Honda a tune-up. Go to Sam's Club and buy them a flat of toilet paper and stock it in their basement.
Why not, as the ancients used to, kill something delicious for them and lay it on their door-step. Astag, a salmon, a sow. Or, as someone I have been seeing might suggest, spend the day in penitent prayer on their behalf.
If you don't watch NBC's The Office, you're missing out.
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