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May 13, 2009
Welcome to the real world
"We have to talk," the doctor said, stonefaced.
It's always those words, no matter the context, where you just know a serious bomb is about to be dropped.
I'd found myself in the emergency room of Brackenridge Hospital in Austin last week because my abdomen was aching. I'd played a demanding tennis match the weekend before and felt like I'd pulled a muscle in my abdomen, but the pain wore off several days later. So I went through a rigorous fitness training Thursday to stretch and loosen my body (and mind, I suppose) but the next morning my stomach felt like it had been punched hard. Plus, I was drenched in an unfamiliar cold sweat at 7 a.m.
Dude, go to the emergency room, the smart part of my brain told the clueless part that avoids doctors and the medical system.
After several hours and numerous fondlings by various doctors checking for hernia or a red-lining appendix, and having had my first CT scan (it's like being inserted into the middle of a giant Krispy Kreme donut, sans glaze waterfall) the attending ER physician came into my curtained-off room and dropped his word bombs.
"You have cancer."
I could tell he was trying hard to keep his composure.
Gulp.
Well, I tried to swallow. The next moment was like a movie scene where I saw myself standing in a doorway as the walls around me wobbled then melted. It was the doorway between certainty and uncertainty. Dream-world and eye-poking reality. Patient and everyone else. Maybe even life and death. It was a Matrix moment for sure and not what I expected.
Then I had to remember to breathe.
"You have renal cell carcinoma, and it has produced a grapefruit-sized tumor on your right kidney," the doctor said. "We need to take care of this as soon as possible."
Like the majority of people with a cancerous, funked-up kidney and no obvious symptoms, mine was discovered accidentally. Perhaps the difficult body stretches I did the day before upset the tumorous squatter enough to pull the fire alarm of cold sweats. Nonetheless, that day in the ER was an early beginning to a very weird week, but I'm lucky and grateful to have family and friends who immediately volunteered to become my support system while I keep waiting to wake up from this dream.
The prognosis? So far, it's good. My capable surgeon, Dr. David Phillips, himself a high-level tennis player, which made me like him immediately, will evict this tumor, this cancer, this hobbit, along with my entire kidney, on Friday. He says indications are it's confined to the one kidney, and I should be strong enough in 4-6 weeks to work, work out and have a nice, productive life being a one-kidney man. I never thought I'd be glad to say I have two kidneys in case one of them freaks out.
So there you go. If I make only sporadic appearances for awhile, you'll know why.
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Crossing my fingers!
Sorry for having not enogh english to say, what I feel and wish. Hope that You understand it anyway.
Whoa.....wasn't sure where this was going at first and I sure didn't think it was going to end up where it did.
Thoughts, prayers and lots of good vibes headed your way.
Wishing you strength and patience while going through this. Take it easy for a while, Ben, we'll be here when you get back :)
Long time reader,
Vero
Like Vero, I am long time reader. News such as yours is always a shock but the prognosis is good and you will be on the court in no time. Best wishes for a speedy recovery!
Looking forward to your distinctly Ben-like written version of the journey ahead. Sending you good vibes, too.
Wow that was a shock to me, let alone what it would have been to you. best wishes for a successful surgery and a quick recovery.
My prayers and good wishes go out to you Ben for a speedy recovery
Best wishes for a speedy recovery from a longtime lurker!
Ben,
I know you'll have a speedy recovery and you'll be back in the game in no time. Until then, rest up and I'll send my thoughts and prayers down south.
Ben,
I know you'll have a speedy recovery and you'll be back in the game in no time. Until then, rest up and I'll send my thoughts and prayers down south.
Sending my best wishes and much strength for a full and speedy recovery!
I wish you a speedy recovery, Ben! Keep your spirits up, and please let us know updates whenever you can.
best of luck & best wishes for a full & speedy recovery
Hang in there Ben. I'm glad to hear you caught it sooner, rather than later. Best wishes for full and a quick recovery.
Ben, hang in there - and best of luck in your fight against cancer.
All the best Ben. Will see you at your very best soon. Take Care!
Best wishes for a speedy recovery. You're in my prayers.
Wishing for your fast and speedy recovery. Take care!
Dang Ben, this is tough man! Glad you're a fighter because YOU WILL MAKE IT!
The world is pulling for you, and you're going to make it GREAT!
Best wishes for a fast and full recovery!
Hi Ben best of luck and we will be here when you get back mate.
whoa! thanks for sharing. praying for a fast and full recovery quickly
Thanks for all of the thoughts and well wishes. They mean a lot.
Ben, you're in my thoughts and prayers. Jeanne
Ben, as a regular reader and as a person whose mother has recently been diagnosed with cancer, and is coming through the other side, my best wishes are with you and your family.
All the best, Ben. As a longtime reader i am very sad to read such bad news. Wish you a quick recovery!
